Glossary of Terms

Admiration: a social emotion felt by observing people of competence, talent, or skill exceeding standards. 

Adversarial Congress: The appearance of civility and expectation of adversity above ruthless warfare with the expectation of winning, losing, gaining advantages, and increasing resources and/or power. 

Apply Knowledge: Use The Tenets, Right Thinking and Right Action to sort through Stories and reveal truth.

Automaton: you work so hard and use all your energy to maintain the illusion of perfection, defense and protection, you have little to nothing left to devote to self awareness, care and healing.

Bearing Witness: We are generously spared direct damage and personal anguish by providing necessary service. We engage empathy, cultivate compassion and gain insight from another being’s experience that allows us to make necessary choices for the self.

Bone of contention: the cause of a long-standing argument.

Comparison: a mental condition in which one must be better or greater than (aggrandize) in order for another to be less than (diminish).

Competition: the need or desire to prove oneself by winning as expressed in a mental/physical/emotional aggression or challenge for supremacy, power and control.

Deflect: to cause (something) to change direction by interposing something; to turn aside from a straight course, as in accusing others of what the self is doing to shift focus away from the true doings of the self. 

Deflate: To stifle creativity, imagination, enthusiasm, passion, joy, awe, beauty, wonder or other essential life energies in another human.

Dismiss: to definitively discard or reject anything we don’t want to see, hear, recognize, acknowledge, admit to or deal with; to universally reject anything of which we do not approve or with which we do not agree; to order someone out of your superior presence by word or by deed in a condescending, patronizing or otherwise insulting manner.

Disarm: Choose to Stop! using a Defensive or Protective Weapon like Judgment, Dismissiveness; Criticism, Superiority or Entitlement to compensate for the sense of lack experienced within the self.

Empowerment: Healing by freeing the self of the need to Defend and Protect our Choices. 

F.I.N.E.: Frustrated. Insecure. Neurotic and Emotional pretending otherwise.

Humility: The recognition that one does not know, cannot know the length and breadth and depth of any person, place or thing until one learns to question, see and know the self.

Hypocrisy: Do as I say, not as I do, is an impossible expectation. Humans Learn by modeling, not by Listening. The Truth demonstrates Honor and Respect. Do as I ask because I love you, and I’m afraid for you, and I need to know you are safe and coming home offers a Choice. Do as I do because I am Healing, bathing in Gratitude; and experiencing Joy, Beauty, Awe and Wonder; and it’s so awesome, I want to share it with everyone in service to The Greater Good.

Lesson: the presence of uncomfortable emotions followed by an automatic Defensive or Protective response.

Lesson Plan: the Automatic, Always-on, Defense and Protection System developed by the Human Mind in response to trauma, fear, anger and pain.

Lesson Plan Alert!: Something is different. A threat or potential danger is subconsciously recognized. Like a yellow light or a Stop! sign at an intersection; an Alert! signals the need to pay attention. Choice and Lesson are present.

Lesson Plan Activation: The physical body responds to the Alert! with emotional energy and a discomfiting visceral response.

Lesson Plan Escalation: Emotional energy increases exponentially to fuel fight or flight. One is still capable of Recognizing, Acknowledging and Attending The Lesson. The more emotional we are, the more Rigid we are, the less Choice we have in the moment.

Lesson Plan Engagement: The Lesson Plan is Actively Defending and Protecting. Weapons are drawn. Weaknesses have been identified. The mouth is running. Judgment, Criticism, Accusation, Anger, Rage, Outrage, Righteous Indignation, Fear, Fury, Hostility, Disappointment, Disenchantment are focused into Weapons and directed at The Threat. The intention to Damage results in Damage to the self and at least one other Human. Once The Lesson Plan is Engaged, Choice is eliminated. The Lesson and The Lesson Plan remain present, regardless of whether or not we choose to Attend them.

Exercise Curiosity: Ask Questions and Listen to the answers especially when exercising curiosity about the self.

Lesson Plan Debriefing: Applying The Tenets, Right Thinking and Correct Action to the Engagement and critically questioning and assessing both the Engagement and our post-Engagement condition to gain knowledge and insight about The Lesson Plan and the Self. How do you Feel? What can be seen? What can be Learned? How is it different or the same? What will you do next time this Lesson is presented?

Lesson Presentation: Any sudden or unexpected experience of emotional discomfit signals Lesson Presentation. The sooner we Recognize and Acknowledge The Lesson, the more Choice we have about how we respond.

Lesson Resistance: No! I won’t see that. I won’t agree. I won’t consider it! Whether loud or silent Resistance is always a No! Resistance is The Lesson Plan feeding itself. Resistance is always a Lesson in Willingness and Intention. The Questions are: What am I Resisting? What put it there? Does it Feel Good? If not, what would? How shall I manifest that?

Lesson Resolution: The successful completion of any Lesson marked by two outstanding factors — we chose to be or were automatically different and we Feel Good about both, the outcome and the self. 

Lesson Avoidance: We know it’s there. We just can’t face it; we’ve accepted we can’t change it or we’ve chosen not to clean it up. What we Resist persists. What we Avoid stalks, hunts, haunts, chases and follows us wherever we go. One way or another, what we Avoid will make itself Known.

Pairs: Any two Humans choosing To Learn with one another. 

Pods: Any group of up to six Humans choosing To Learn as an interdependent unit.

Release: The successful movement of stored traumatic energy from the body that confirms Learning and accompanies permanent Healing. Ref: Waking the Tiger by Peter A. Levine

Resistance: The universal, internal, No! I won’t see that. No! I won’t Feel that. Not gonna do it that signals The Lesson Plan is Defending and Protecting itself.

Resonance: the state of a system in which an abnormally large vibration is produced in response to an external stimulus, occurring when the frequency of the stimulus is the same, or nearly the same, as the natural vibration frequency of the system. 

Seek Assistance: ask for help from people who know by experience, expertise or profession; Listen to the answers; gain knowledge, develop insight and apply wisdom.

Self-assurance: The Sense of Confidence in the Self’s ability to consistently make self-affirming, Honoring and Respectful Choices that Feel Good.

Scripts, Lists and Stories: The litanies we repeat in exactly the same way each time and the recitation of our continuous, on-going pet peeves, complaints, arguments, opinions and battles.

Spiritual Generosity: The condition in which we are able to share a spark of joy or kindness by being thoughtful, aware of and kind to others; and by Recognizing and Acknowledging others with genuine appreciation and/or heartfelt Gratitude. 

The Goodness of Your Heart: The energy we give or things we do without thought or need for recognition or recompense because we are moved to or it’s right or it Feels Good or all three.

The Greater Good: The unknown, universal benefit to the self, other humans, our planet and all its inhabitants of our choice to cultivate Honor and Respect For The Self and All Others At All Times and/or our decision to do no harm. 

The Path to Healing: A spiritual school for Humans predicated upon the idea that Earth is a school and The purpose of Life is To Learn.

The Plan: Stop! Breathe. Focus. Question. Choose.

The Tools: The Tenets, Right Thinking and Correct Action; Willingness, Intention, Permission; Honor and Respect; Truth, Choice, Impeccable Honesty, Gratitude, Humility, Kindness, Spiritual Generosity and Love.

Weaponized Human: A Human with a Lesson Plan who Damages the Self and others with or without awareness and intention.

Wise and Trusted Counsel: A Human who is willing To Listen and provide truthful objectivity and insight without Judgment. One of my most wonderful and beloved counselors pointed out that I was Judging someone for being Judgmental. Thanks to S.K. I no longer do that.